When something becomes nothing

I have often wondered why we do what we do, this is obviously a small part of a bigger question.

Most people in this country have thousands of different careers that they could chose from. i am single and childless with no responsabilities and i have not been born into a spoon carving dynasty with the expectation that i carry on the good spooner family name. So why do i chose to make spoons, well it should be obvious why spoons, so i'll focus on why "Make".

Creating something is a very satisfying thing, and when you focus your efforts onto one type of thing you gain much understanding, the way you think about and feel about your creations becomes deeper. For me there is the challenge and there is the outcome. i enjoy the challenge and i think this is in part simply because of the need to do something, there is a sense of progress as i become more proficient at manifesting the spoons i dream of making.

Then there is the outcome some spoons i love because they are beautiful. and not just aesthetically their beauty is in their functionality or their simple lines or something special that only i know about them such as where the wood came from and the circumstances of the wood retreival, or what was going through my mind at the time of making. Sometimes the spoons are ugly and i love them because they are so. sometimes i will stare for hours at a spoon wondering about it's existence. Using a spoon to cook or to eat, when i see someone eating a meal with one of my spoons i am filled with joy and what can be better than serving someone food with a spoon you have made for them. There are times when i have produced things i have been so proud of i have cried (how embarassing!).

When it comes down to it i aim to make something that has pure ideals, a spoon that functions beautifully and has clean efficient lines too simple to hide any lies, ordinary in every way but special beyond measure.

And when you hold something like that, something precious to you and someone takes that away and you realise that precious thing you thought existed no longer does. when something becomes nothing, and that space in your heart that it had filled is now just empty.

If i'm being honest it's that empty feeling that drives me on to keep making, it's the only reliable way i can fill the void.

so why do you make things?
Barn the Spoon